I was a small young man
with a small life. Just 19. Inexperienced, and naïve. That was many many years
back. My parents were farmers (still they are) – my father worked in the fields,
and mothers cooked. My village, Chuzagang, a very remote village, was a full
two-hour walk from Gelephu Town. I suppose I could begin from here, an incident
that had happened to me 11 years ago.
So every morning, my
parents would ready my journey. They prepared breakfast and pushed Nu 10 note
in my hand. Whereas, I combed my hair, dressed in fresh gho, fed on breakfast
and then set out early. To Gelephu. The Dasho Dungpa’s office. To get the
Dasho’s signature on a form for the identity card of my sister.
And I had to run across
several ungainly terraces of rice fields, avoid abuse from village youth, and
escape dogs’ chase. Worst of all, I had to walk the infamous river, Maokhola,
all alone.
At 9 in the morning, I’d
reach the Dasho Dungpa’s office in Gelephu, all exhausted, drenched in sweats. The
form has been reviewed by the admin assistant already. And outside the Dasho’s
chamber, I waited for him to arrive and get his signature on my form.
“Dasho is in a very
important meeting. He cannot come today, come tomorrow,” announced the office
assistant to us. There were four of us. I made my way back home.
The next day, again, we
waited for the Dasho outside his chamber. At times, we walked in the office and
asked the office staff about the Dasho. The staff who dressed rich and spoke
only in English never answered us properly. They got angry, instead, disconcerted
at us.
Dasho didn’t come the next
day, either, nor the day after that. And soon a week went by. By then, we were over
15, waiting for the Dasho’s signature. There was nothing for us to do until the
sun goes down. So we would walk down the office lane, bask in the sun, listen
to each others’ stories, buy lunch in canteen, and take nap and return to
waiting.
One afternoon, Dasho came
to his office, donning himself in a colourful kabney. Our hope got lifted up
and we ran into his chamber, in line, our forms in our hands. But he just walked
out. For the record, he didn’t even look at us. Then, he drove off in a big Toyota
car. We heard from others that he was going to attend his daughter’s birthday.
After a week, my parents
stopped giving me pocket money – perhaps they didn’t have it. All day, I would
yawn, scratch my head, hunger intruded. And as the sun set, I would run back
and reach home only when the dinner was cooking. This created so much of stress
even for my family. Fights broke out between my parents.
However, next morning I
would walk to the office, in a furious hope that this time, perhaps this time,
the Dasho may come.
Let me tell you something
about ‘waiting’. It’s so sickening, truthfully speaking. The waiting makes you
furious, anxious and agitated. After sometime, it becomes a pain. It pains even
if you sit, walk, talk or eat. Later, you boil, burn out – all inside. The last
stage - hopelessness and apathy engulfs you. Then, you become a mechanized monster.
So I too became a monster, then,
a hater. You never know, after that incident, how much I used to detest the
government officials, bureaucratic system and above all, Dashos. After 10 days
of painful waiting, and of course the longest 10 days of my life, I got the
form signed by the Dasho.
About a decade later, I’ve become
a civil servant too. When I think back on this particular incident, I often feel
myself with a surge of affection and pity. But today this truly helped me understand
my duties and responsibilities as a public servant. Our duty is not limited to paper
works, tours, meetings and workshops, and honing skills in public speaking and
making PowerPoint presentation, but way beyond that - to serve people.
Different people enter our
office seeking directions and support, and helps and favors. I know that it
takes your few minutes to guide or help them, but it can save their weeklong
time, traveling and money.
And way advance, I wish you
all a very wonderful Losar!