Monday, September 19, 2011

A narrow escape!

I will never forget the harrowing experience of last evening. I narrowly escaped from the death’s jaw! Yes, I am talking about the 6.8 magnitude naka that hit Bhutan at 6:41 PM last evening.  

Let me report you my observation and my own experience from the place I stay. I live at Motithang in Thimphu, on the sixth floor of a yellow building. That moment, I was watching a BPL football match on TV in my bedroom. Tottenham’s Luka Modric scored a goal against Liverpool. I was celebrating the score with the team when my TV started shaking so hard. Novels from my shelf started falling down. My cosmetics started rolling here and there and things in the washroom hit the floor. It’s undeniably an earthquake, I reacted immediately.

Training had taught me to crawl under the table when you are hit by the earthquake, but I have only one living room centre table, that’s also glass one. I ran out of the apartment with my sister, barefoot and the door unlocked. Forget about the things in my apartment (which I bought with my last one year’s savings), forget about my parents and beloved ones, from the sixth floor of the building I ran for my life-downstairs, toward the ground. The building shook so thunderously that I felt that the building was running over the course of a rough road, in high speed. A riotous sound of unlikely colliding building was produced. Other tenants were crying, shouting for their kids and rushing downstairs. Some were crawling downstairs as the building shook heavily.

All of us were dumbstruck, nervous and lost.

Honestly speaking, I had only one thing in my mind, which is guaranteed undoubtedly. That before I reach the ground floor I would be smashed into the building’s crashes and become a dead log in a few seconds. I didn’t apprehend exactly how I reached the ground floor when the naka stopped after 12 seconds (approximately). It means within a dozen of seconds or even less I could run from the sixth to the ground floor. If I had this pace and stamina in the Olympic then I would have broken the record of the world’s fastest track runner, Usain Bolt.

Residents were considerably relieved after they could make on the ground. Every one in Motithang stayed outside, still hesitant to move in fearing aftershocks.

A rumour had it that again there’ll be “a more dangerous naka at 8:30 PM”. All the residents of Motithang waited outside till 9 PM expecting another shock. But rumour was always rumour, a false one. Another rumour had it that there’ll be a shock at 11 PM. Though raining intermittently, we stayed outside till midnight, some under the umbrella, car owners in their cars and other under the tree shades. Most of us never returned homes, we slept outside in our cars because yet another rumour said “there will be shake again”.
                                            
But what had disappointed me so bitterly last night was not that the naka shook us. As I watched the BBS TV for information, the lousy BBS proved it lousiest character yet again. Damn, instead of covering live news on the earthquake, it was telecasting LIVE Drungtsho programme. It carried no information on its footage other than the earthquake’s magnitude and its epicenter. And the host consoled the viewers, “Don’t panic!” But what we wanted that hour is not the moral consolation from a TV host but reliable sources speaking to us whether the rumours we had are true or not. We wanted our voices and concerns (like rumour) to be heard instantly through mass media. We wanted the RJs and TV journalists to visit the panicking public and reach our concerns to the concerned authorities right away, but until last night I knew how unconcerned and unprofessional they are.

Also, the home ministry and the department of disaster management showed their sheer ineffectiveness, unprofessionalism and unpreparedness in dealing with the natural disaster. In such incident they should have monitored arm forces in the crowded areas like Motithang, the town, Changjiji and Olakha to stop people from panicking and avoiding them from moving in until aftershocks are over. They should have used the radio stations, the TV and the mobile networks in disseminating the relevant information to the panicking general public immediately.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Citizenship

The essay below won me the second prize in the non-fictional essay writing competition organized by the Bhutan Centre for Media and Democracy, UNDP, and UNDEF for the celebration of the fourth International Democracy Day today: 

“Citizenship is an articulation of an inclusive political association and common culture that unites all inhabitants of diverse ethnicity, religion or race…The state is an association of citizens, all free and all have the same rights and carry respective duties.”
                          -Feliks Gross (1999), the American Sociological Humanist

The Bhutanese public was, to a large extent, primarily conservative, traditional and apolitical. Bhutan’s transition was initiated, planned and controlled solely by the Kings. There was neither external pressure from the outside world on Bhutan to democratize, nor have there been any internal demands for greater participation for the people. However, since 1998 the fourth Druk Gyalpo King Jigme Singye Wangchuk guided the country to rapid transition to democracy. Every major activity was geared towards people empowerment, decentralization and people’s participation. And in 2008, the country became a constitutional democratic monarchy.

With democracy gifted from the royals, the Bhutanese publics are bestowed with greater, newer and important rights and responsibilities to determine our own political, economical, social and cultural system. From apolitical, passive and dependant populace we are driven to active, well formed and responsible citizens.

The Constitution of the Kingdom of Bhutan was adopted and it has granted certain legal and fundamental rights to all its citizens like freedom of speech and assembly, rights to press, property rights and to one’s own religion and culture.  Also, certain social and political responsibilities have been granted such as rights to participate in the exercise of political power-whether as a voter, a candidate or public officials.

However, citizenship is more than this in a new democratic Bhutan. It is encompassed by normative principles, values and expectations that all derive from social, economical, historical and cultural context of the times. It is a higher responsibility to live united and achieve everything as one harmonious family.

On the National Day, His Majesty the King Jigme Khesar Namgyal Wangchuk declared to the nation: “Today we have great aspirations-the peace, stability, security and sovereignty of the nation; strengthening of our new democracy; equitable socio-economic growth to achieve GNH and; nurturing our youth to one day lead a nation greatly strengthened by our hard work and commitment. To achieve all this we need trust and faith in our relationships-between the government and people; between institutions of government and; between people ourselves.” It is very clear from the National Day’s address that the concept of citizenship in a democratic Bhutan is to promote cooperative living. Individuals or groups or agencies with different interests and opinions are obliged to sit down with one another, have dialogue, negotiate and support each other.

In 2008, we elected the government which serves the people. But the citizenship role is much broader than just taking part in the democratic processes and choosing leaders to foster vibrant democracy. 

As Marina Liborakina, a Russian activist stated, “As citizens, we are responsible for how we are governed. The main issue is…to broaden citizens’ participation…especially in decision making on crucial issues of security, peace, and military.” Citizenship, thus, means a right to participate actively in public management which is of great significance for our country which is in the process of creating a modern, political and economic system. Well informed, adequately and timely consulted citizens taking part in the direct decision-making can fully contribute to sharing of responsibilities with the representatives, planning and working together.

Debating public issues, attending community meetings and petitioning the government are some other rights and responsibilities of the citizens. Public debate provides an opportunity for every individual to discuss all local issues and to critically re-examine them for the purpose of finding adequate solutions. Moreover, non-governmental organizations can assist the government offering citizens especially members of sensitive groups such as youth, women and disabled person a platform to voice their concerns and include them into the governmental process.  

Besides, social media networks such as Facebook, Twitter and blogs are further facilitating the citizens’ freedom of speech. It provides accessible channels for the citizens to take active part in the governance of their country where people voice their opinions on development and raise pertinent questions for the exchange of knowledge and experience on development issues.

To define and limit the government’s power and hold them accountable, the Constitution and other constitutional bodies like the Election Commission of Bhutan and the Anti-Corruption of Bhutan are established.

In general, citizenship demands us to be concerned and to care about the world around us and then act on the problems. From nurturing our environment, protecting it from exploitations, we are to raise issues relating to negligence of underprivileged and fighting against indiscriminate and injustice in our society. We have duties and the responsibilities to care and respect for other fellow citizens, their cultures and ideas. As we love our country and abide by law, in return the state upholds its right to defend our rights.

However, citizenship is not limited to one’s country. We are also the citizens of the international community as we have been bestowed with human rights and a voice in international matters that affect us. We have responsibility to care about other citizens of the world and to have an understanding of their cultures, histories and ideas. In a global world, we live in an interconnected world with crucial transnational dimensions and it is citizens’ responsibilities to be informed on how geopolitical realities shape life today. 

In conclusion citizenship is a common culture that unites all the citizens of diverse ethnicity, gender, religion and interests where they have the same rights and respective duties to carry irrespective of who we are. Citizenship builds a strong civil society (even global) marked by harmony, understanding, cooperative living and trust to achieve our aspirations and find peace, economic prosperity and GNH.

Monday, September 5, 2011

Fatal Attraction

Believe me or not, I have this untreated attraction to flowers, understandably fatal. Perhaps flowers are beautiful but its delicacy and untainted sweet scent exuded conjure my nerves so fatally. More funnier is that I had this uncivil tendency in the past...that whenever I saw beautiful flowers I couldn't help myself pushing forward to pluck it. So rude, na?

But not anymore! Seriously! And ya, to immortalize and epitomize the beautiful flowers in my grasp, I shoot the photographs of it very often. The photographed flowers remain forever fresh in my PC, unwithered, undried and unrotten. Very smart of me! Sissy!

Mind you, the below one is not an artificial rose. I had snapshot of this uniquely beautiful rose when I went out for cultural visit above Simtokha. To pluck it or not to pluck it was the sheer temptation. Lucky that I had my camera and here's the rose, Ha-ha!

  Purple is amazing colour. And if you love purple, here's this beautiful flower for you!

The season of fall, autumn has already begun; yet you can see flowers budding in Thimphu. Lo! I have this gorgeous budding flower for you:

Love-me-love-me-not...you remember your childhood days when you were playing with a flower. Wild but a wonderful one. Here's this attractive flower for you! I hope it will rekindle your good old days:

A bee feeding on sunflower nectar. A perfect harmonious existence, though:

And for all of you, my wonderful readers and undoubtedly for those who are in love, here's a beautiful rose for you. A good day!

Monday, August 8, 2011

Drag me to Hell

Advice: If you truly believe in the existence of God, Heaven and Hell, please don’t read this post. 

I had this dream recently. A dream, understandably weird! But what I found out in this dream may surprise you! It surprised me! Read on, and you’ll see how.

I’ll pause briefly here. Sigh! For, you’re making an audacious step to listen to my bizarrely weird dream. Gain yourself a good composure. Cool!
After my death, well, the Lord of Death examined my merits and demerits. After ascertaining that I had led a responsible and compassionate life, He deservedly sends me to Heaven. Common! Don’t envy me. It’s just a dream, and a weird one, ha-ha. I told you already, na?
And who wouldn’t be so excited about being ascended to Heaven? Exactly! I am extremely joyful as my ultimate truthful wish has been fulfilled. Aha! I attain eternity of peace and happiness.

Now you must be wondering how the Heaven looks like? You want me to describe it for you? Hmm-mmm, so here it is.  Oh jeez! I stand awestricken by admirably beautiful landscapes of Heaven and serenely flowing brooks and staircases. Guess what? Heaven has streets of pure gold, gates of pearl, walls decorated with every manner of precious gemstones. It’s a city of pure gold, as pure as glass.
Listen here, nothing impure ever exists here and the residents live eternally in the presence of God. In short, it’s a place of joy, peace and love. A pair of angels, identical to each other, who guide me to the Heaven, gently whisper in my ears, “This is place only the righteous shall deserve to attain.” Negative terms connoting adversity, hunger, pain, famine, rejection and anger seem unseen and unheard. Everything is literally perfect!

However, a sudden pang of missing-kind-of-feeling yanked up deep inside me. Funny, right? I start missing my parents, my girlfriends, my beloved siblings and relatives, my friends and office colleagues. Funnier is that they are dead too but are sent to Hell. What’s the use of coming here when all of my beloved ones are sent to Hell, I moan. Or is it just the earthly attachment that I couldn’t renounce yet?

Here, my friends and neighbors are seemingly Rimpoches, monks, nuns, lamas, bishops, popes, priests, Christian fathers, Brahmans and sadujis. Every one, en masse, engross in marathon-spontaneous prayers their Holy Scriptures unfolded in front of them. I desperately want so far as to say that they don’t have time to greet their new arriving guest. No one has time for each other. I feel disregarded and shamed!
I forgot to tell you that a system of rules of conduct or method of practice in Heaven is purely based on Drig-lam Namzhag. Or bura math kaho, buro math dekho, bura math suno, bura math khao is the mere institutionalized way of life here. I must say, rather angrily, that the freedom of expression and basic human rights is utterly denied here. Several occasions, I fall in love with those extraordinarily ravishing female angels, but I can’t express my true love. If I do, I will be doomed forever. Sounds weird, right?

All time I have to stay cross-legged saying prayers. The prayers are for those sentient beings dwelling in the Purgatory and Hell, they reason on me. Oof! I am exhaustingly bored here. Perhaps these are the reasons why all Rimpoches and Lamas do not stay long in Heaven. They are reborn again and again, come back to earth as Truelkus.

Remember, it’s easy to go to Hell. Just have fun, party with your friends, freak out with hot girls, drink and eat. You be what you are and do what you want to. That’s all. Very simple. And go to Hell.

And I have this simple justification in my mind, though regretful. Like Rimpoches and Lamas, I want to go back to Hell, reborn as a human, or as a truelku or even as a beggar. So I return to the Lord of Death and request him to drag me to Hell, a place of torment but it’s also a place where my beloved ones are and where I have the world’s freedom and rights or be what I am.

When I opened my eyes, it was morning, in my bed. Is this Hell? Whatever, I will be having fun, partying with my friends, drinking and freaking out, my freedom and rights restored. And going to Hell is obvious.

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

It always hurts more to have and lose than to not have in the first place

Prologue: This is a true story narrated by my niece, Banira. It occurred at a remote village in Sarpang just a year before the anti-national protests in southern Bhutan. 

Maya was just 12 year-old when she was married off to a man of her father’s age. Her aging parents, poor, arranged her marriage, for this groom supported them financially. They had nothing to repay him, so they gave him their daughter’s hand.

Maya was a shy girl and so courteous that she spoke in a voice barely higher than a whisper. Unaware of anything like man and marriage, she agreed upon what her parents had decided for her.

A couple of years later, Maya’s first child was miscarriage. She wailed like a child when the village elders wrapped the dead child in a piece of cotton cloth and took just a mile away. They hung it on a tree branch as their custom would have it that a miscarriage cannot be buried or burnt or given a proper funeral.

Her second child survived; a daughter identical to her. That evening her husband killed rooster for dinner as a humble celebration. And to protect this lovely child from evil or premature death, she and her husband gave her an ugly name, Kali.

When Maya was 20, she met with another misfortune. This time agonizingly horrific: her husband died from untreated malaria. The in-laws booted out her from the house as they called her a witch and accused her for causing untimely death of her husband. They ostracized her. Also, they deprived her of her own daughter.

She was left without any place to go. In a typical Hindu custom, a daughter cannot return to her parents and live with them after the marriage. It would be a disgrace to her parents.

She had a distant relative in the next village where she sought refuge. Her relative was helpful and protective, but she lived in an absolute loneliness.

Two autumns passed. One evening when she went out to fetch water from the spring, she met a handsome man. It was her love at first sight. Tshering was his name, and he was in late 20s. Dressed in black leather jacket and jeans pant, he wore side-pungs. She found him so charming that she started thinking of him every second. She dreamed to be with him, in the warmth of his embrace, longing to hear his sweet voice.

Secretly during night hours, she always went to meet him. They hid under a bush, under starry nights and shared infinite love notes and kisses. Each night she spent with him, she fell in love with him more intensely and more she needed him. She discovered Tshering was so caring, loving, dear to her who made her life complete.

One night, under the bush, Tshering asked her for the greatest treasure that Maya could ever give him. Obviously sex. She felt that this was the first time any man had asked her for that. As he entered her, she felt Tshering was the first man she ever made love. She never felt this before, though she had spent eight years with her late husband. 

What is love? What is romance? What is a kiss? What is a love bite? What is lovemaking? She never knew these until she met another man in her life.

Now she got everything that she wanted in her life: love, companion, affection and protection. She didn’t want to lose all this. So she decided to marry Tshering.

However, this happiness of her was short lived. One night, Tshering told her that he has to talk to his parents about their marriage and he went back to his village in eastern Bhutan. That night she cried as she missed him terribly and felt lonely. She didn’t feel this pain even on the day her husband or first child died or even when she separated from her parents.

She waited and waited for his come back to marry her. But Tshering never return. Several months conceded. She started panicking, once again feeling lonely, depressed and alienated.

After ten months, she heard from a neighbor that Tshering was a married man. Heartbroken, she fell on the ground and never rise. She died, betrothed and unheard.

Epilogue: But who knows her story? The person who gave the news about Tshering’s foul game to Maya is my niece who narrated this story to me.

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Blind, but with a Vision

Amrith Bahadur Subba, 30-year old, a colleague of mine is visually impaired. He lost his eyesight to untreated red-eye epidemic that struck the vicinity when he was just nine.

Today he works as a counselor with Department of Youth and Sports, MoE in Thimphu. In addition to regular counseling, guidance and information services, he helps the management in administrative write-ups and organizing certain youth programmes.
Many people wonder how he, a blind person, works in his office. Let me mention here, I am also amazed at the way he works. Very professional in dealing his clients, he is also effective in all administrative works. If you’re seeing him working in his office for the first time, he would make you impressively awestruck.

In the office, most of the time he spends in front of his computer. Advanced technology has made it possible for him to work on the computer with the help of a screen-reading software called JAWS (Job Access With Speech) which reads anything that appears on the screen. Yes, he too is on facebook, Yahoo! Messenger, Skype and he too blogs. He uses HP printer and scanner without anyone’s help. He prepares his own presentation slides and uses the projector in a very proficient style. He can walk to and fro from his office to washroom without any escort. A good vocalist, he is very much interested composing songs. To his name, he produced an audio album in 2005.

Happily married to a caring wife and fathered two children, when at home, mostly he spends his time cooking. I am enthralled each time I watch him chopping the vegetables and cooking it. And after half an hour or so, he readies delicious ema datshi, ezey and other Indian-style curries. He can even cook non-veg. Hey, trust me, this writer has tasted his foods many times. Awesome!

Unlike other careless Bhutanese men, he wears gho himself. That’s also very neatly.

To briefly account his achievements, Amrith is a gold medalist in BA English Literature from Bharatiyar University, Tamil Nadu. After he stood fourth in RCSC exams 2005, he did his PG in Public Administration for one year from Royal Institute of Management, Simtokha.
                                                            
He was considered one of the independent and very successful disabled persons in our country; however, an inevitable challenge had never stopped him from becoming completely independent. He couldn’t walk alone once he was out of his house and office-he always needed a person to escort him.

Many of you who know Amrith might have seen him every morning and evening being escorted to his office and back to his house. The person who has been escorting him is me. For the last one year, I helped him escorting as his wife had to stay home to babysit their young children. 

But a problem cropped up! There’s no one to escort him when I was away for tours, trainings or on leave. He became handicapped again!

It was in last April, a week-long Mobility Training for Disabled was conducted in Punakha. I encouraged him to participate in the training as it aimed to empower the disabled person through making them walk independently. Likewise, the training taught him the handling of the white cane (walking stick), finding shorelines of a road or footpath with the help of the cane, discovering landmarks (edge of a footpath) and how to walk on staircases.

However, even after the training he couldn’t walk alone as his house is half a mile away from the office. More difficult was that he has to cross two crowded traffics between Swimming Pool and Kelki School. But I had consistently encouraged him to make this audacious attempt.
Encouragement only was not enough. Everyday I had to train him on the route between his house and office. I escorted him, but this time mentioning him about shorelines of the footpaths, roads, traffics and landmarks of all the gates, fences, playgrounds and buildings. He studied, sensed and felt with his cane. From the third day, I made him walk on this route, unescorted. I would be behind him watching him walk with his cane and shouting at him if he had missed or overstepped the shorelines or landmarks. 
                                      
After one week of extensive training, I had to go for a fortnight-long training (resourced by NBCC, WHO) in Paro. One afternoon, when in Paro, I received a phone call from Amrith. It’s a good news, “Hey! I’ve become independent! Today I walked office alone. From now on, I can walk alone. Thank you, Rikku!”

As he was buoyed by his achievement, I also reveled in triumph and punched the air in celebration,

“Yesss!”     

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

When a Large Family participates in the Election Day

Before 2005, the role of our family had been insignificant. However, as soon as our country raced preparing for the Constitutional Democratic Monarchy since 2005, each member of our family felt that we are of importance in the making of democratic government.

During the General Election Campaign in late 2007 and early 2008, our family members unanimously received unexpected attention and favorable treatments from the contesting candidates for NC and NA. Any kind of favor and support have they offered us. And they were seen, unbelievably, being pleasant to our family members, very courteous and helpful.

Now as the Local Government Election is on the card, again our family is already on the receiving end of a good behavior from the Gup and Tshogpa candidatures. Frequenting our house, they always offer us with doma or buy beers for my father. The official works which used to be done in one month are now being done in a couple of days. Meet us anywhere, they smile and talk nicely. It’s incredibly strange. Why are they treating our family differently from other families in the village?

Just a month ago, the Election Commission of Bhutan (ECB) posted voter cards to us. And I just counted the number of registered and eligible voters in our family. There are 34 (out of 44) who can vote from our family in this Local Government Election Day. In my village, today there's a total of 260 eligible registered voters. That means 13.1 percent of the total voters are from our family.

However, this is a completely different and a huge responsibility on the shoulder of each member of our family-13.1 percent of all village responsibility yoked on our family. The decision of our family, right or wrong, is going to make a huge difference in this Election Day, in selecting the local leaders.

As a large family, having 13.1 percent of total votes in our hands, we remind ourselves solemnly that we should not be driven by the selfish inclination while voting for the candidates. When we mushroom together, especially during evening tea, the family members extensively discussed about the candidates. Keeping aside all the favoritism and good treatments that we receive every day, our family members are fueled by an unwavering oath to vote for the candidates who can benefit the whole village-who can answer the prevailing local concerns and issues, bring positive social changes in our village and strengthen the root of good governance.    

Monday, May 16, 2011

It ain’t all my fault

I have a secret to tell you, dude. But, hey, promise me that you don’t tell my parent. It’s kinda crap thing. Perhaps this shit may arouse nauseating repugnance in you. But if you really want to hear this lousy thing of mine…ok! Lemme start! Umm…my name is Dorji Tobden Ningtob and a Class 12 student of Motithang HSS. I am just 16 now.

Well, it’s also pretty nice to tell you that what a lousy student I am, a student tagged “below average” by my teachers. My teachers quite expect me to do well in school-develop civic sense, score good in tests and exams, do homework sincerely and perform well in extra-curricular activities. And it’s quite stupid that each time I land up doing just opposite.  

Shit….that my parent also has huge expectations from me. It creaks like hell when they always demand me to get “high marks”, be “knowledgeable”, qualify to a good college and get a dignified job. They are sort of too much bothered about my growth and the foods I take and always want me to stay away from addictions and gang fights. Alright! To tell you frankly, my parents are very protective but they demean me each time they direct me like to a 6-year old kid. “Do this”, “Don’t do that”, “Good for you”, “Bad for you”. If there’s one thing to hate, it’s their goddamn advice.

And like crazy, often I take that crap “banned” stuffs called drugs and cigarette. All my friends are kind of “psycho” and troublesome, and I pretty love to do what they do and feel awesome to be in their company.

Oh, ya, the policymakers and the law of my country want me to inculcate GNH values, preserve our culture and be a productive and patriotic citizen. Oof! Man, see now, I am not as carefree and as useless as you think. I too have many wishful expectations from different stakeholders to uphold, and shit responsibilities that drag me nuts.

Hang on, man…I too have many things to bother about myself. Studies and good job are my top priority, but I am also equally concerned about my body image and sexuality. I love to look damn slim and tall and wear the trendiest clothes and look superb “cool”. Ha-ha!

You’re damn right if you’re thinking that I have a girlfriend. This is the fourth girlfriend of mine, the first one being when I was in Class III. My parents and teachers are “touchy” on this matter, but all time I am horsing around with girls. And of course I do carry condoms in my purse, but mostly land up having unprotected sex. I am damn careless!

Now, dude, you must have this judgment in your head that I am a lousy student, a bad son and irresponsible and unpatriotic young man. Huh! It ain’t all my fault. But tell me one thing, why the expectation of my parents, teachers and entire society juxtapose to what I think and do. Is it coz I don’t understand them or vice versa? Or value of conflict?

But, hey, I want to let you know that I have no dearth of problems and opinions that I can’t share with my parents and teachers. Yuck! Even if I do, they won’t take it seriously and understand my feelings. You know that at this knocker age, I undergo biological changes, it’s onset of my puberty. And I just fear what’s this coz my parent never talks openly with me. I swear to God, this is not even in the syllabus of my school textbooks. So how should I understand this? From whom?

Have you realized one thing about my parents from this shit talk? My parent always looks for my future but sadly they forget my present. They want me to do well in exam, get a good job and become a responsible man. What the heck! And it creaks like a bastard.

Actually, I want my parent to feel, understand and explore the difficulties I am experiencing now. I terribly want them to respect me as a unique individual. Darn! I don’t want them being judgmental, giving me advice, presumptive or assumptive and providing me ready made solutions. I want them to clarify my conflicting issue and help me discover alternative ways of managing myself and my crap situations, so that I can decide what course of action or behavior is helpful to me.

Here, my dad says that he grew up in a safe environment. In his time, he narrates, there was no TV and its influences, no gang culture and substance abuse, and no HIV/AIDS. Unlike him, I live in a damn changing world where I am virtually vulnerable. Now I am transiting into new roles in society. Next summer I will be joining college. I love to be a guitarist and want to join music school, but for Chrissake, my parents pressurized me like hell to join engineering college.

Tell me, dude, what I do now….